Attention: Miserable Gout Pain Sufferers
Doesn’t Matter Whether You’re Moaning and Groaning in Agony from Your First Gout Attack or Your Twentieth,
You’re About to Find Out How to IMMEDIATELY Extinguish the Flames That Set Your Foot On FIRE . . .
By Slamming Down My Killer “Secret Formula”
Made with a Couple of Stupid Simple Items
Straight Outta Your Kitchen Cabinet!
Dear Fellow Gout Victim,
It all starts with a dull ache. Then the swelling and redness kick in, and before you know it, you’re rolling on the floor, crying for Mommy and begging for someone, anyone, to put you out of your misery.
Sound familiar?
Boy, do I feel your pain. I was blindsided by my first round of gout pain 15 years ago, and I had it wicked bad. Since then, I’ve suffered hundreds of gout attacks in my toes, feet, ankles, knees, fingers, hands and wrists and I’ve had three separate surgeries to get rid of Tophi – the middle toe on my right foot, 4 fingers on my right hand, and 2 fingers on my left hand.
Fortunately for me (and now you), I found the “secret formula” for FAST, lasting gout relief. . .
Since those early days of gout, I endured countless gout attacks in spite of all the pharmaceutical drugs the doctors had me on. I tried everything: the cherry juice, ACV, not drinking, being vegetarian and all the other stuff they say to do out there, all to no avail until I found “The Formula.” Not because I wanted to, but because I had no choice, I found the right combination of things to do to be gout-free; I’m now considered an expert in this field and have earned the title – The Gout Killer – and that makes me well qualified to help you.
In other words, I’m not some poser out there trying to pass along the same-old recycled crap you hear from every Tom, Dick, and Harry who claims to be an expert on gout relief. I’ve been down in the trenches, suffering those midnight trips to the ER and chasing after every so-called quick fix to get rid of the mind-numbing, ball-busting, just-kill-me-now TORTURE of gout disease.
And I’ve found a gout remedy that works, not just for me but for many of my clients and friends as well. Check out what others have to say about my “secret formula”:
____________________
“You know what, I was following what you suggested and it works, it really does. The funny, well, not really funny for me, was that I went off it. Yes, I cheated on “stuff” {you told me to do} and the next couple of days, I noticed the pain was back. Live and learn.
Thanks again for all your advice, it’s going to take time, but in the long run I’ll be healthier.”
Cindy
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“Hope you are well Bert. I am the best I have been in many years. Thank you Bert for helping me through a really rough time with gout. My hat is off to you for your dedication, and help.”
Best,
John
_____________________
“Thank you…{for your advice}, it has made me feel healthy and gout-sickness free….I don’t feel borderline gout attack every day now.
THANK YOU!”
Terry
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“Oh thank you Mr. Bert I had a serious attack of gout but thanks to your tremendous website it has cleared. Bert ur the man!
Thanks,”
G Rumple
.
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We’ve never met, but I do know these 3 things about you:
- You’re sick and tired of the pain and frustration of Gout…but you have no idea how to get rid of it.
- You’re living in constant fear of being ambushed by gout and just “getting by” from day to day (that’s no way to live your life!).
- You’d do whatever it takes to NEVER feel that gout pain again!
Well, I’ve got great news for you. You’re about to discover your secret weapon in the fight against Gout.
You ready? Here it is:
Introducing The Ultimate Handbook for Kickin’ Your Gout’s Ass and Showing it Who’s Boss
Over the last couple years, my friends, co-workers, my own conscious, and others have constantly harassed, encouraged, and cajoled me into sketching out my road map about how to live gout-free – so I finally gave in and put my top-secret gout remedies down on paper.
Inside, you’ll discover the very best and most up-to-date Intel about how to be done with gout. It’s 43 pages of no fluff, no kidding tips and techniques you can immediately use to Kill Your Gout Now!
A few people that got a sneak peak at this book told me that what I put in those 43 short, easy-to-digest pages is worth hundreds or even thousands of dollars in cash that might have otherwise been wasted on doctor visits, pill pushing, and expensive surgeries – none of which offer the fast, natural, and lasting gout relief you’ll find in these 43 pages.
I admit, this handbook won’t win any design awards for prettiest layout – I’m no graphic designer. And if you want to be impressed with eloquent or fancy writing, this probably ain’t the goods for you, but if you’re looking for practical advice you can rely on, directly “from gout hell”, written by someone with years of experience and who knows your pain, I can help you! This little e-book will transform the way you look at gout and teach you how to be free from the misery and pain of it.
My Kill Your Gout NOW! Handbook shows you exactly how to kill your gout . . . IMMEDIATELY.
Here’s a taste of what’s inside the book:
- A no-brainer “recipe” for killing gout NOW (you prob’ly have the ingredients in your kitchen cabinet right now – and could be on your way to gout relief within minutes of downloading this e-book)
- Why toughing out your gout pain is not just stupid, but could be slowly killing your ass
- A “gout foods to avoid” list of the major culprits most likely to bring on a gout attack – and a “take-it-to-the-store” grocery list of what you should be eating instead
- 6 essential components to gout-free living (including one thing you didn’t learn in kindergarten – but is so easy, a 5-year-old could do it)
- The one silent killer that is likely to blame for most of your gout flare-ups (and it’s created by our own traitorous bodies – damn them – but I’ll show you a super-fast fix you can do with no equipment, medications, or out-of-pocket expenses)
- Easy-to-follow action steps to Kill Your Gout Now – so you’ll know exactly what to do at the first sign of your next gout attack (and can save yourself hours or even days of agony)
- 2 ways to conquer gout-causing stress and fatigue…for good
You may have a few questions by this point, like:
Will Kill Your Gout NOW! work for me?
If you’ve read this far, you’re probably asking yourself if my Kill Your Gout NOW! e-book will work for you, right? Here’s the thing: I promise that all of the nuggets of gout wisdom I reveal in this very special guide will work for you, for your family, your friends, your co-workers, your dog, your cat, and even your enemies.
But if for any reason you’re not completely satisfied with the results, let me know and I’ll give you your money back!
One of my close friends recently told me, “you’re so incredibly young, strong and healthy. . . I can’t believe you’ve ever had gout!” I’m just tellin’ you this as further proof that I have the been-there done-that real-world knowledge, learned straight from the trenches of gout-hell, about how to totally conquer gout…and I’m sharing it with anyone who’s got the rocks to step up to the plate and swing for the fence.
And now, the question of the day…
How much will this cost me?
Before we get into how much this will cost, think about the alternative. How much will you spend (hell, how much HAVE you spent already?) on doctor visits, prescription drugs, etc. (none of which work worth a damn anyway)? How many hours of unpaid wages have taken huge (and sorely felt) chunks out of your paychecks because you were in too much pain to drag your ass to work?
I can tell you from my own experience that if you keep on going the way you’ve been going, you’re gonna spend (or lose) hundreds of dollars on the low end…thousands, more like it.
Or you can learn from my mistakes, keep your hard-earned cash, and save yourself a butt-load of gout pain, all for the crazy low investment of just $9.99!
So what’s the catch, right?
Well, I’m going to level with you … this information is so powerful that I prob’ly should be charging at least double (and, as some have argued, up to 10 times) the price…and any moment now I could come to my senses and start charging what this thing’s really worth.
But for now, my main goal is to get this info in front of as many folks as possible for two main reasons: A) so as many people as possible can get quick gout relief (‘cuz I’m all about helping my fellow man) and B) because this is a brand-spanking-new handbook and I want happy customers spreading the word to their fellow gout sufferers (hey, we all gotta make a living somehow, right?), even if I have to practically give the damn thing away to start with.
Plus, I’m all about rewarding people who get off their ass, stop whining, and starting DOING something proactive, so I’m offering this tell-all, get-quick-relief guide to those who are ready to take fast action toward their gout relief for just $9.99. There is one condition, though – you gotta:
Read it and do what it says damn it!
If you’re just gonna let this sit on your hard drive and not even read the frickin thing, you might as well save your cash. But if you’re ready to Kill Your Gout NOW, let’s get started already!
So it’s decision time . . .
To get instant access to this downloadable handbook, right now, no joke, click the “Download Now” button you see below . . .
Still Unsure About Your Measly $9.99 Decision?
Let me sweeten the pot even more! Not only can you get the greatest guide you’re ever going to find about how to defeat gout, if you act fast you can also grab these Bad-Ass BONUSES:
- Free Bonus #1: Special Report ~ Gout – Precursor to Heart Disease and Diabetes? (In which you’ll find out the links between Gout, Diabetes and Heart Disease…and why Gout in its early stages can be a life-saving wake-up call)
- Free Bonus #2: Special Report ~ What Does Tophi Look Like? (Use this to instantly identify when your gout is becoming potentially fatal so you’ll know it’s time to get off your ass and seek immediate medical help)
- Special Bonus #3: The Audio/Video Recording of the Kill Your Gout NOW! Handbook produced by The Gout Killer himself (in case you want to give your eyes a break, you can listen to these nuggets of gold right on your computer)
- Special Bonus #4: A downloadable mp3 recording of the Kill Your Gout NOW! Handbook read aloud by The Gout Killer himself (great for loading onto your iPod and listening on the go)
That’s right! It’s a 3-for-1 special you won’t find anywhere else. You get my Gout Killer handbook, all of this time-tested and PROVEN gout wisdom, and print-audio-video formats, all for the insane low price of just $9.99!
Click the “Download Now” button below to get started now!
Still not sure about parting ways with your 10 bucks?
I can understand why you might be cautious; you’ve writhed in pain with one vicious gout attack after another and when you’re in that kind of indescribable pain, $9.99 is a lot of money. (LOL!) And after all, we’ve never met – you don’t know me and I don’t know you . . . but that’s part of the reason why I’ve priced the book so ridiculously low at just $9.99.
But that’s not all…you’re also backed by our no-questions-asked, 30-day satisfaction guarantee:
Our 30 Day 100% Money Back Guarantee
Our 30 Day 100% Money Back Guarantee
Satisfaction GuaranteedThanks,
Bert Middleton – The Gout Killer
Plus, your credit or debit card payment is processed by Authorize.net, and it’s fully protected and guaranteed by them (if you’ve never processed a payment with Authorize.net before, they’re ruthless when it comes to protecting consumer . . . so even if you don’t believe in my guarantee, trust that they’ve got your back). I am so confident that you’ll benefit enormously from the information that I’ve tried to tear down all barriers for you.
Demonstrate a little trust in me and you’ll be happy as a pig in shit as I repay you many times over with all this valuable gout killin’ information in my simple yet power-packed handbook. I’ve been told that I should be charging at least 10x the asking price, but lucky for you I haven’t yet come to my senses and raised the rate.
Act now, while this handbook is still available for less than a 12-pack of beer and Be Done With Gout Pain NOW!
P.S. You MUST act now. I honestly don’t know how long I’ll keep this handbook priced at the insanely low price of $9.99. FYI, I reserve the right to increase the price at any time without warning. That’s why NOW is the best time to grab your mouse and click on the “Download Now” button you see below . . .